Know the Facts About Who IS Lurking On the Internet…for Your Kids Sake

We are learning every day of more and more kids who are on Facebook and other social media sites are ideal prey for predators. Every parent, adult and child must be educated about internet safety. Please read, digest and share the following information with your loved ones and others. You never know how many lives you may touch today.

After tossing her books on the sofa, she decided to grab a snack and get on-line. She logged on under her screen name ByAngel213. She checked her Buddy List and saw GoTo123 was on. She sent him an instant message:

ByAngel213:

Hi. I’m glad you are on! I thought someone was following me home today. It was really weird!

GoTo123:

LOL You watch too much TV. Why would someone be following you? Don’t you live in a safe neighborhood?

ByAngel213:

Of course I do. LOL I guess it was my imagination cuz’ I didn’t see anybody when I looked out.

GoTo123:

Unless you gave your name out on-line. You haven’t done that have you?

ByAngel213:

Of course not. I’m not stupid you know.

GoTo123:

Did you have a softball game after school today?

ByAngel213:

Yes, and we won!!

GoTo123:

That’s great! Who did you play?

ByAngel213:

We played the Hornets. LOL. Their uniforms are so gross! They look like bees. LOL

GoTo123:

What is your team called?

ByAngel213:

We are the Canton Cats. We have tiger paws on our uniforms. They are really cool.

GoTo123:

Did you pitch?

ByAngel213:

No, I play second base. I got to go. My homework has to be done before my parents get home. I don’t want them mad at me. Bye!

GoTo123:

Catch you later. Bye

Meanwhile, GoTo123 went to the member menu and began to search for her profile. When it came up, he highlighted it and printed it out. He took out a pen and began to write down what he knew about Angel so far.

Her name: Shannon

Birthday: Jan. 3, 1985

Age: 13

State where she lived: North Carolina

Hobbies: softball, chorus, skating and going to the mall. Besides this information, he knew she lived in Canton because she had just told him. He knew she stayed by herself until 6:30 p.m. every afternoon until her parents came home from work. He knew she played softball on Thursday afternoons on the school team, and the team was named the Canton Cats. Her favorite number 7 was printed on her jersey. He knew she was in the eighth grade at the Canton Junior High School. She had told him all this in the conversations they had on-line. He had enough information to find her now.

Shannon didn’t tell her parents about the incident on the way home from the ballpark that day. She didn’t want them to make a scene and stop her from walking home from the softball games. Parents were always overreacting and hers were the worst. It made her wish she was not an only child. Maybe if she had brothers and sisters, her parents wouldn’t be so overprotective.

By Thursday, Shannon had forgotten about the footsteps following her.

Her game was in full swing when suddenly she felt someone staring at her. It was then that the memory came back. She glanced up from her second base position to see a man watching her closely.

He was leaning against the fence behind first base and he smiled when she looked at him. He didn’t look scary and she quickly dismissed the sudden fear she had felt.

After the game, he sat on a bleacher while she talked to the coach. She noticed his smile once again as she walked past him.. He nodded and she smiled back. He noticed her name on the back of her shirt. He knew he had found her.

Quietly, he walked a safe distance behind her. It was only a few blocks to Shannon’s home, and once he saw where she lived he quickly returned to the park to get his car.

Now he had to wait. He decided to get a bite to eat until the time came to go to Shannon’s house. He drove to a fast food restaurant and sat there until time to make his move.

Shannon was in her room later that evening when she heard voices in the living room.

“Shannon, come here,” her father called. He sounded upset and she couldn’t imagine why. She went into the room to see the man from the ballpark sitting on the sofa.

“Sit down,” her father began, “this man has just told us a most interesting story about you.”

Shannon sat back. How could he tell her parents anything? She had never seen him before today!

“Do you know who I am, Shannon?” the man asked.

“No,” Shannon answered.

“I am a police officer and your online friend, GoTo123.”

Shannon was stunned. “That’s impossible! GoTo123 is a kid my age! He’s 14. And he lives in Michigan!”

The man smiled. “I know I told you all that, but it wasn’t true. You see, Shannon, there are people on-line who pretend to be kids; I was one of them. But while others do it to injure kids and hurt them, I belong to a group of parents who do it to protect kids from predators. I came here to find you to teach you how dangerous it is to talk to people on-line. You told me enough about yourself to make it easy for me to find you. You named the school you went to, the name of your ball team and the position you played. The number and name on your jersey just made finding you a breeze.”

Shannon was stunned. “You mean you don’t live in Michigan?”

He shook his head. “No, I live in Raleigh. It made you feel safe to think I was so far away, didn’t it?”

She nodded.

“I had a friend whose daughter was like you. Only she wasn’t as lucky. The guy found her, did bad things to her and then murdered her while she was home alone. Kids are taught not to tell anyone when they are alone, yet they do it all the time on-line. The wrong people trick you into giving out information a little here and there on-line. Before you know it, you have told them enough for them to find you without even realizing you have done it. I hope you’ve learned a lesson from this and won’t do it again. And, please tell others about this so they will be safe too, okay?”

“It’s a promise!”

That night Shannon and her Dad and Mom thanked God for protecting Shannon from what could have been a tragic situation.

Take care and STAY SAFE!

Personal Safety Expert and Child Abuse Prevention Specialist
Anny is the President of The Realistic Female Self-Defense Company and Project Safe Girls

Anny received her PDR (Personal Defense Readiness) Instructor Certification in 2008. Anny is also a Child Abuse Authorized Facilitator and Prevention Specialist who trains adults to prevent, recognize and react responsibility to child sexual abuse through Darkness to Light's Stewards of Children certification program.

Your Road to Healing: Simple Steps to Get You Off to a Great Start

By Pamela Chapman

It’s easy for coaches, ministers and experts to tell you it’s important to find your way and life-purpose. It’s easier said than done. Isn’t it? In my previous blog, I told you that no matter how difficult or challenging your journey, you lack nothing. Every good thing has already been prepared and given to you for your healing. Today, I’d like to share some road-trip steps that have assisted me. Remember, this is my experience. These tools helped me and continue to be a part of my path to abundant living. However, I am confident if you follow, are consistent and dedicated you will see and begin to live the change.

Become Aware - You must first become aware of the dysfunction, unhappiness, and chaos in your life. I like to call this the drama in your life. Here are a few questions I’d like you to contemplate.

1)                  Are there traumatic, stressful, debilitating, and catastrophic events always occurring in your life?

2)                  Are you always worrying about something and when there’s nothing to worry about, you worry because you don’t have something to worry about?

3)                  When life is calm, are you bored?

4)                  Are you often asking, “Why me?”

5)                  Are you always the martyr, always the victim?

You need not share your responses with anyone, but the next step to finding your road to healing, your road to abundant living, is honesty. If you can’t be honest with yourself then who can you be honest with? Bill Watterson puts it this way. “It's not denial. I'm just selective about the reality I accept.”  Humorous? Yes. But, not when it begins to negatively affect your finances, impede your happiness and stifle your abundance. Why pretend you’re fearless when you’re fear-filled? Why say you’re free, when you’re oppressed? Why say and recite truths when, in reality, there is very little evidence that what you’re reciting is having influence. Is it just mindless utterances you are in the habit of quoting?

Once you’re honest about what you’re wrestling with, get an understanding. If you struggle with debilitating fears, attempt to get to the root. Did the fear come from mom, dad, or another authoritative figure? If you settle in your relationships, work, or affairs ask why? Usually this stems from low self-esteem. How do you really feel about yourself?

Don’t be afraid to go inward. The answers lie within. Yes, God is Almighty, All Creator. Yes, He is in complete control. But, it is also finished. It is my belief that all things have been prepared. It is either finished [completed, ended, done] or it’s not. This means your path, your life-purpose has already been created. It is up to you to find it. You must find your own yellow brick road. God is not behind a magic curtain or invisible hemisphere waiting to react to your every wish, whine or whim. You have the power, all the power you’re ever going to get. You have the authority and ability to co-create for your life. Thwarting responsibility—either waiting for God or blaming the devil—can leave you needy, wanting, and powerless. Go within. Find the God-given power within. Be relentless. God power is in each and every one of us. Empower yourself.

Take Action. While God helps those who help themselves is not an actual Scripture, in every example of Christ healing or helping others, an action was required. For example, the woman with the issue of blood had to press through the crowd and touch the hem of Christ’s garment. The blind man spoken of in John 9, after Christ made a mud/saliva salve and put it on the man’s eyes, he was told to wash in the Pool of Siloam. Even when there was no affliction but a party, action was required. Christ’s first miracle of turning the water into wine, Mary, His mother told the servants to do whatever He, the Christ, told them to do. He instructed them to “fill the jars with water,” and then “draw some out.”

You can’t stand idly by waiting and hoping for your healing. Yes, change is a process, and your road to healing is a process; but, isn’t “process” a course of action? Ask for divine guidance which requires quiet time with you, and then MOVE with unbridled faith and energy.

Raise Your Energy. EVERYTHING is energy. You want to raise the abundance in your life, raise your energy. How? Incorporate lively, positive music into your life. Dance like you’ve never danced before. Shout life-changing declarations at the top of your lungs with great enthusiasm. Pray, Mediate. Laugh. Sing. And, when life tries to slap you down, jump up and slap it back. Declare, I AM Invincible, I AM an Overcomer, I AM more than a Conqueror. Get excited. Be excited, and Remain excited.

If you take these first steps, remain consistent, dedicated and focused I promise you will embark on a life-changing journey of happiness, love, and abundant living. YOUR SATISIFCATION IS GUARANTEED.

“Yes, Virginia, there really is an Anti-Claus.”

By Angela Dove

This week as I packed up holiday decorations, I replayed my memories of Christmas morning when my children, 8 and 5, rushed into the living room full of excitement and expectation. My daughter oohed and ahhed over her new doll, complete with pup tent and sleeping bag. My son rushed to the miniature astronauts gathered around a tiny space shuttle and launching platform. In that moment, the world my children knew consisted only of magic and goodness, of expectations met and surpassed. Like many loving parents, I wish I could arrange more elements of my children’s lives, ensuring each day offered them joy and excitement and goodness.

But I can’t.

The best I can do is to love them, and to level with them: the same world that offers them so much goodness also contains danger. They will see it. They will experience it. And they need to be prepared for it.

I was near my daughter’s age, walking through my middle class neighborhood, when I noticed a car slow down as it passed me. I continued down the sidewalk, and within minutes the same car—a large Buick with rusting paint—pulled up to the curb two houses in front of me, waiting. The situation did not feel right. No one was getting out of the car. It was sitting there, idling, obviously waiting for me to walk beside it. 

My mother had drilled me on situations like these, even though I was still in elementary school. And acting on her warnings and advice, I never broke my stride. I turned up the front walkway to the house directly next to me and walked purposefully toward the front door. Sure enough, the waiting car pulled away immediately. In fact, the driver was in so much haste that the balding tires squealed against the pavement. Once the car was gone from view, I left the front porch of the house and hurried home.

Was my mother wrong to tell me of the dangers of the world at such a young age? No. In fact, she may have saved my life.

As a member of the next generation of mothers who value their children’s wellbeing above all else, I have begun to teach my kids about the dragons that inhabit their usually wonderful childhood kingdom. And the lessons seem to be working. While my son and I were grocery shopping this week, he accepted a hard candy from an elderly gentleman, thanked him politely, and then handed the candy to me as soon as the man was out of sight. That man, a stranger, probably meant no harm. But my son, at age 5, knew from our “Stranger Danger” talks that the candy would go directly into a trash can. My daughter’s 3^rd grade curriculum incorporates similar lessons to those I teach at home.

One day I will tell my kids my own experiences—how a friend I trusted tried to date rape me in high school (and how lucky I was to escape). How my stepmother was murdered later that same year. How there are huge groups of people who have faced similar evils. And the importance of the talks I now give to survivors of violent crime and those who work with them and for them.

Packing away our stockings and holiday garlands, I almost feel guilty for these thoughts, as if I am desecrating the wonder of Christmas and expectation of a brand new year. But here’s the overriding truth:  just as my husband and I took great care on Christmas Eve to prepare our living room for our children’s joy, there are some who take similar care and pleasure in arranging pain, and worse, for others. These are not Grinches who will be touched by the singalong down in Whoville and subsequently allow more love into their hearts. No. These are the Anti Clauses of the world. They carry around a sack of heartbreak, trying to sneak it into the homes and lives of their would-be victims.

I suppose I could pretend that my kids will always be shielded from potential harm, but I am too aware of how that adds to the dangers of their world. Would I refuse to tell my kids that stoves get hot because I hoped so ardently they would never be burned? Of course not. They need to know about danger, and to be savvy about the ways it will present itself to them. Like my daughter’s new coat and my son’s snow boots waiting for them under the tree, these are the more practical gifts I give my children—gifts that will prepare them for the times they journey outside of the safety of our home.

For tips on teaching kids about personal safety, visit www.SafetyCops.com, www.MyChildSafety.net, or www.McGruff.org

***Angela Dove is a public speaker, award-winning columnist and author of the true crime memoir,  No Room for Doubt: A True Story of the Reverberations of Murder (Berkley/Penguin 2009). She welcomes feedback at www.AngelaDove.com.

"Trust Me, I AM YOUR INTUITION"

By Anny Jacoby

You are walking to your friend's home suddenly it is night fall. The directions you were emailed earlier in the day from your friend are a bit confusing, you're not exactly sure where you are. You pick up the pace, walking faster, you pass Second Street, Third Street, Fourth Street, Fifth Street. In an instant your eyes are drawn away from the piece of paper in your hand and you look around, realizing that you are now, totally lost.

You panic. You begin to speak to yourself, "Breathe....breathe". Looking around you feel vulnerable because you do not know where you are; your mind is trying to figure out where you might be and you are limiting your self-protection because you are distracted. As you continue to walk toward the next block, you see two men leaning against the side of a building. You start to think.....Should I ask them for directions? However, you start to get a deep uneasy feeling in the pit of your stomach.

Something is telling you to turn around and go in the opposite direction. The warning voice in your head will not go away and it only gets louder and louder matching the increased pace of your heartbeat. You stop, the slight hesitation in your footsteps grabs the attention of the two men. Do you ignore your gut feeling and brush off this strange feeling as paranoia? Or, do you listen to THE voice in your head of the warning signals going off and run like hell?

Listening to intuition is often the most ignored safety step. Intuition and awareness are the first two steps to safety. It's always easier to dismiss our hunches with logic or rationalizations. In some cases, we can get away with choosing to listen to logic or wishful thinking over our intuition. But the consequences of taking unnecessary chances can be something we carry for the rest of our life if something bad happens.

We often do not respect our instincts/intuition because we don't want to become paranoid and make unreasonable decisions as a result. We need to be able to trust our gut, our brain needs to be equally involved in that process. The best way to determine the usefulness and accuracy of intuition is to use it. When it comes to deciding whether or not to confront a possible dangerous situation and you begin to get that weak, ill, warning feeling....it's best to trust those warning signs. This is YOUR INTUITION facing the threat and telling you to get away.

So, you ask....how can I tune in to hear my intuition? Following these suggestions may be of help:

1. Listening to intuition always requires a choice of where you place your attention. Ignore anything that will distract your attention.

2. Be silent.

3. While being silent, focus your attention on emotional feelings, images or words that come to your mind. This allows you to identify what your intuition is saying.

4. Be willing to do what intuition says to do.

5. Don't question it: Intuition NEVER engages debating.

6. Follow your intuition.

7. Understand that other people will always have judgments about you. You determine what is right for you! Don't do what your best friend or others tell you what to do. Don't rely on trusting your elders because we have heard for years "they have the years of experience". Listen to your own intuition and act on it.

Your intuition will ALWAYS lead you in the right direction. You are the only one that knows what YOU are feeling.

Isn't it just easier to trust intuition?

Is there anything wrong with BEING SMART?

I would rather be wrong of my intuition than risk putting myself in danger.

Wouldn't you?

Take care and STAY SAFE!