Actress Jennifer Hudson Under the Bright Lights of Life

Julian King, Age 7

In Chicago yesterday jury selection began for William Balfour. He's standing trial for the October 24, 2008 murders of Darnell Donerson, 57, Jason Hudson, 29 and Julian King, 7.

Balfour was the estranged husband of Julia Hudson who had threatened her just days prior to making good on his promise because she was ending the relationship. He does the unthinkable after murdering Darnell and Jason, taking Julian who likely witnessed the murders of his grandma and uncle Balfour takes the keys steels an SUV belonging to Jason Hudson and the child's bullet ridden body is discovered three days later in Chicago's West Side Englewood neighborhood.

When neighbors were interviewed and an Amber alert was in effect for Julian, they reported hearing shots fired but no one reported the bang, bang sounds because in this neighborhood the sounds of gunfire are commonplace.

At the very core of these murders stands a daughter, sister and aunt whom in one day, lost her entire world to one man's anger and rage. Yes, intimate partner violence and homicide strikes and erase's lives of families from every social economic level of our society. But when it affects someone famous the world automatically puts on a different pair of rose colored glasses.

Jennifer Hudson's star would rise and fall all in a matter of months. Her rise to the national spotlight on American Idol followed by a nomination and Oscar for her performance in the movie "Dreamgirls," to the fall of her only bright star in her life, her mother Darnell, Jennifer's entire world.

That is what intimate partner homicide does it hijacks those left behind to pick-up the pieces of their lives. Forever, a survivor is changed, their entire world as they once knew it, gone. It affects generations. The following year on August 11, 2009, Jennifer gave birth to a baby boy. Her child will never know the warmth and love of his grandmother, uncle Jason or cousin Julia. This was not some isolated incident, but a planned out execution.

As the trial makes national headlines how about we provide information on those currently living in fear for their lives. How about we direct those in violent relationships to create a plan that includes information at the document the abuse site where victims are directed to create the evidentiary abuse affidavit. They too, are someone's bright star who deserve to end a relationship with their lives!

Time's Up!

Susan Murphy Milano is a staff member of the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education as a educator and specialist with intimate partner violence prevention strategies directing prevention for high risk situations and cases.

A national trainer to law enforcement, training officers, prosecutors, judges, legislators, social service providers, healthcare professionals, victim advocates and the faith based community and author.. In partnership with Management Resources Ltd. of New York addressing prevention and solutions within the community to the workplace. Host of The Susan Murphy Milano Show,"Time'sUp!" . She is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated "The Roth Show" with Dr Laurie Roth and a co-host onCrime Wire. Online contributions: Forbes : Crime, She Writes providing commentary about the hottest topics on crime, justice, and law from a woman’s perspective, as well as Time's Up! a blog which searches for solutions (SOS) for victims of crime. And the author of the upcoming book "Holding My Hand Through Hell."

New Law: Cowboys, Indians and The Oklahoma Medical Examiner's Office

Last week the Chanda Turner Reform Act went into effect in Oklahoma. The new law is groundbreaking. It provides families whose loved ones deaths were ruled "suicides" the ability to appeal the medical examiners ruling in hopes of having the cause of death changed.

The new law is appropriately named after Chanda Turner 23, shot to death at her home on July 12, 2000. She was ending the relationship and moving on with her life minus him. Her boyfriend who has significant ties to the town from everything to erected street signs, park plaques to a relative as one the original founding town member of Pauls Valley, claimed Chanda shot herself.

Crime scene photo's would tell a different story, the truth. This includes the photo's taken of defense wounds on the shooter. But, the heavy handed political powers in town, the very people that magically appear on the original crime scene log the evening of the 12th or do not appear depending on which log you view, cover-up the truth. Just so a powerful family in my opinion can keep their son out of prison.

Sadly, no one thinks about the prison for Chanda Turner's family. They endured a nightmare for nearly a dozen years. From the day their daughter was murdered they have fought against the powers of political corruption and cowardice by their own community. Last year while in Oklahoma, I witnessed firsthand many turn their backs during my trip for the families seeking justice and those on the Justice For The Dead site created by attorney Jaye Mendros. By mid-week the tide had turned people were finally listening.

Now, with the new in place, the train to justice has pulled out of the station and is headed on track to the halls of justice.

The journey for justice is not only about a new law, but a group of people, strangers really who came together for a cause greater than themselves. The power of one family, the Turner's reaching out to others whose loved ones also lost their lives by someone else's hand. The medical examiners office(s) in the state of Oklahoma recklessly stamping death certificates as suicides when in actuality are homicides.

Make no mistake if you are a family of a suspicious death or you know in your heart that a loved one did not die by their own hand, do not give up. Fight for justice in their untimely silence. If you do not believe you can make changes to correct a corrupt or blind system, get a hold of me and I will connect you to Joe and Donna Turner!

http://www.okcfox.com/newsroom/top_stories/videos/kokh_vid_4220.shtml

Susan Murphy Milano is a staff member of the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education. She is a specialist with intimate partner violence prevention strategies and high risk cases and available for personal consultations through the Institute. She is also part of the team at Management Resources Limited of New York.

Susan is a contributor to Forbes : Crime, She Writes a powerhouse lineup of female true crime professionals, experts and authors providing commentary about the hottest topics on crime, justice, and law from a woman’s perspective.

Susan is the author of "Time's Up: A Guide on How to Leave and Survive Abusive and Stalking Relationships,"Moving out, Moving on, and Defending Out Lives. Susan is the host of The Susan Murphy Milano Show, "Time's Up!" . She is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated "The Roth Show" with Dr Laurie Roth and a co-host on Crime Wire.

Topeka Kansas: Successfully Votes Making "Domestic Violence Legal"

By Susan Murphy Milano

In Topeka, Kansas on October 11, 2011, members of the City Council voted and successfully repealed the city's ordinance banning domestic violence during National Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Talk about a punch, a kick and slap for victims of intimate partner violence by city government’s financial misconduct as their excuse for not wanting to do their jobs. At the center of dysfunction, the absent District Attorney Chad Taylor, who is refusing to prosecute domestic violence crimes in the city.

During the two hour televised council meeting, the one sided discussion from 7 of the 10 elected members amounted to nothing more than political finger pointing. Leading the charge, and ultimately dictating the vote, was Interim City Manager Dan Stanley, brow beating those during the hearing into submission of his way or the highway. It was classic manipulation "101" presented in a live stream real time format.

According to National Advocate, organizer and expert Claudine Dombrowski, in attendance at the City Council meeting, “I witnessed the Council of elected officials support the decriminalization of domestic violence within the city limits of Topeka and berate speakers, who were survivors and victims. The elected council members temper tantrums during the meeting and finger pointing were disgusting.”

Approximately 24 years ago, after years of lobbying by victims, advocates and families of those slain by their partner, legislation was signed by Governors nation-wide making domestic violence a crime. The pen used to sign the bill, was not filled with ink, but the blood of all those who lives were lost at the hands of those professing to love them.

This "stunt" today will cost Topeka more than the mere 10% budget shortfall cited by city officials as the reason not to prosecute. Expect an increase in intimate partner related missing persons cases (providing they will still be allowed to make a report) and count on more funerals for those victims whom the police did not respond.

This certainly gives new meaning to creating prevention and awareness during National Domestic Violence Awareness Month, doesn't it?

· “16,800 homicides (that are reported) attributed to intimate partner homicide per year, 2.2 million medically treated injuries costing $37 BILLION per year.

· The cost of intimate partner violence exceeds $5.8 billion dollars each year; $4.1 billion of which is for medical and mental health services.”

· Almost one-third of female homicide victims that are reported in police records are killed by an intimate partner.

· In 70-80% of intimate partner homicides, no matter which partner was killed, the man physically abused the woman before the murder.

· Less than one-fifth of victims reporting an injury from intimate partner violence sought medical treatment following the injury.

· Intimate partner violence results in more than 18.5 million mental health care visits each year.

NCDAV reporting sourced from: The Cost of Violence in the United States. 2007. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, National Centers for Injury Prevention and Control. Atlanta, GA
NCDAV reporting sourced from: The Cost of Violence in the United States. 2007. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, National Centers for Injury Prevention and Control. Atlanta, GA
Federal Bureau of Investigation, Uniform Crime Reports “Crime in the United States, 2000,” (2001)
NCDAV report sourced from: Campbell, et al. (2003). “Assessing Risk Factors for Intimate Partner Homicide.” Intimate Partner Homicide, NIJ Journal, 250, 14-19. Washington, D.C.: National Institute of Justice, U.S. Department of Justice
U.S. Department of Justice, Bureau of Justice Statistics, “Intimate Partner Violence in the United States,” December 2006
Costs of Intimate Partner Violence against Women in the United States. 2003.

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Susan Murphy Milano is a staff member of the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education. She is a specialist with intimate partner violence prevention strategies and high risk cases and available for personal consultations through the Institute. She is also part of the team at Management Resources Limited of New York.

Susan is the author of "Time's Up: A Guide on How to Leave and Survive Abusive and Stalking Relationships,"Moving out, Moving on, and Defending Out Lives. Susan is the host of The Susan Murphy Milano Show, "Time's Up!" . She is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated "The Roth Show" with Dr Laurie Roth and a co-host on Crime Wire.

Murder in Progress: Elizabeth New Jersey

[In the town of Elizabeth New Jersey, a murder is being planned, in progress, by a commissioned police officer as I write this post.]

The officer and his wife have been married for more than a dozen years. The couple has 2 children. Yesterday, she had her husband served with divorce papers after years of having a gun pulled and cocked to her head, numerous rapes, and terroristic tactics to keep her a victim and not call police for help. “I’ve had enough” she said. “My husband is not going to get away with it.”

This officer has not acted alone, receiving assistance from his fellow tin shield cowards in uniform as they assist this bozo with a badge. To add fuel to this already deadly flame, the officer’s brother is a high ranking Lieutenant, his supervisor in the same department.

Similar to Kathleen Savio , wife of former Bolingbrook Police Sgt. Drew Peterson,( who is awaiting trial for her murder) found dead on March 1, 2004, in a dry bathtub, Savio was also silenced with the assistance of fellow officers with the same pattern of conduct taking place in Elizabeth, New Jersey.

During the months leading up to the discovery of Kathleen's corpse, officers routinely sat in their squad cars in front of her house, drinking coffee -- the ultimate 'screw you' for thousands of police officers' wives whose cries for help fall on deaf ears. In March 2002, Drew Peterson and Kathleen Savio filed for divorce. On March 11, 2002, Kathleen secured a temporary emergency order of protection. In an unusual move before the divorce was finalized, Kathleen also signed a power of attorney so Drew could buy a home just down the street with his then-underage new love interest. Victims of violence always wish their aggressive, abusive partners would move on to someone else. Kathleen’s strategy was brilliant. She got out of her own way; however humiliating at the time, she disarmed Peterson by waiving her rights to the property as a marital asset. Kathleen knew firsthand the danger she faced from Drew, a police officer and abusive husband, if she refused to sign the document. She signed it only out of pure fear.

When all her attempts failed to get help from the police -- those whose job it is to serve and protect -- Kathleen Savio wrote letters to then-Will County Assistant State’s Attorney Elizabeth Fragale documenting Peterson’s alleged abuse. They included claims that in July 2002, Peterson held a knife to her throat and threatened to kill her. But Savio was only further victimized when the state attorney’s office dropped the ball. Prosecutors should have filed separate felony stalking charges for threatening phone calls from Peterson and for each time he stalked her. They didn't -- not even when the court issued the emergency order of protection against him.

Sending the letters was a courageous move not only by a victim but by a police officer's wife. These letters, written and signed by Kathleen, would not see the light of day until a parade of media swarmed down on the home at Pheasant Chase Drive until after news broke that Stacy Peterson, his fourth wife, had vanished

The Elizabeth, New Jersey's officers wife has also written letters to Attorney General Eric Holder; Newark Attorney General’s office; Office of the Director of the Elizabeth Police James Cosgrove; Chief of Police Ronald Simon; Union County prosecutor’s office; Sen. Frank Lautenberg; New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie; and the Mayor of Elizabeth. The letters were sent on September 22, 2010, detailing the times, dates and details of the horrific violence. The only person whom responded so far is the Mayor who contacted the officer’s wife earlier this week.

Here is a brief overview of it, in her own words, what she has experienced: a Police Officer from the Elizabeth Police Dept., in Elizabeth, NJ. I had my husband arrested 8/12/2010, and was granted a Temporary Restraining Order of Protection. Which was later dropped because the night before going to court; I was threatened by a private caller to drop all charges. I was intimated and scared and never showed up. The Temporary Restraining Order was dropped.

On 8/19/2010 incident of dropping TRO, this gave my husband the opportunity to harass me with phone calls, and threatening texts. I t would start out just being friendly to escalating to vivacious threats of harming me. I tried to ignore them, causing me emotional distress and fear. I fear him, because after many years of mental and physical abuse from him, I know this anger and rage....I know he is going to come after me or what’s most important in my life "My Daughters". This man suffers from a narcissistic personality disorder, which I would have the dept. have him evaluated psychologically.

On September 20- 22, 2010, my husband decided it was a day to harass me with over 50 calls to my home and texting. I sent a email to his Internal Affairs office stating to please advice the officer to leave me alone... this was ignored by the Captain. Nothing was done, because he continued until September 28, 2010. I had to go to Ocean County Court and get another TRO. Which was granted, and he obeyed the TRO... I have a concern with his internal affairs dept. they are conducting a investigation, in which to me seems fictional. I understand that the code of blue is a brotherhood to protect each other. Well in these cases there should be protection for the victim not the Police Officer. We are not trained in the law or how to inflect bodily harm, nor do we carry guns and badges. We have no power or authority to manipulate the justice system.

I could continue but you get the idea. The Elizabeth New Jersey’s officer wife currently has a civil restrain order, which means nothing for her safety and life.

As she say’s “ It’s just a piece of paper, telling him to obey. But it gives me no protection from Police Dept. should he violate the civil order.” I And every physical abuse after my beating, he would throw the phone at me, and “ Go ahead bitch call the police” and laugh.

“I don’t want to be the next victim I want to be safe and alive for my daughters.”

I currently am in the possession of information and documents that I will not hesitate releasing, including names and badge numbers should another incident or threat to harm this officers wife from Elizabeth, New Jersey, take place from this point going forward.

I should mention before I receive correspondence from those angry officers who attempt to post anonomously or send me emails laced with threats, that I was the daughter of a decorated Chicago violent crimes detective. I am an expert in the area of officer related intimate violence and homicide. My career began in 1989 when my mother was murdered by my father.

Gentlemen, I have no problem coming to Elizabeth, New Jersey as I did recently in Garvin County, OKlahoma, with an army of media and others if the powers in place, fail to immediately stop this murder in progress.

(Susan Murphy Milano, is with the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction & Public Psychopathy Education for more information visit http://www.saferelationships.com/ and is the author of the new book "Time's Up A Guide on How to Leave and Survive Abusive and Stalking Relationships available for purchase at the Institute, Amazon.com and where ever books are sold. And she is the host of Time's Up on http://www.herewomentalk.com/ and she is a regular contributor to the nationally syndicated show with Dr. Laurie Roth on http://www.therothshow.com/)

Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit by Susan Murphy Milano from the Book "Time's Up" from Courage Network on Vimeo.