Intimate Partner Violence Revisited in Chicago

  

By Donna Gore

It was August 1993, Susan Murphy–Milano had already lived at least five of her seeming nine lives by that time. She had experienced a childhood like no one should ever have to bear, serving as the “in resident protective services” for her beloved mother who had experienced years of abuse and violence from her detective husband.

“Sometimes Roberta called the police, but she usually didn't even get to see the responding officers. Phil Murphy would flash his badge, joke with the guys, close the door, and return to battering the object of his disaffection…. "He called her sometimes 20 times a day at the office where she worked," notes Milano. "He constantly accused her of infidelities. He claimed she was a lesbian; he claimed she was having affairs with other officers….He always told her, "If you leave, I'll find you; if I find you, I'll kill you."

Susan was reeling from a personal relationship that caused more pain and heartache. She was doing her best to raise a preschooler with the help of a dedicated babysitter. In 1993, she had been taking on the role of Advocate in Chicago’s Domestic Violence Court without question for three years. Even if she was denied, she had the Domestic Violence Act on her side: (Enacted in New Jersey first in 1991).

Back in the day, Susan’s initial most celebrated case played out in the hallowed halls located at 1340 South Michigan was that of Dawn Wilson whose ex-husband, Christopher stalked and beat her and was played out on national TV, newspapers and magazines. “Even before their marriage, he'd push her around. “After we got married, the real violence started," Dawn says. Violence that started right after the wedding and never really let up. Christopher was arrested nine times following the divorce, to no apparent effect. " He asked me once, `Why do you waste your time taking me to court?' He knew he would get away with it."

During the classic feature article, “Life Saver” for the Chicago Reader in which Susan was the topic, a typical offender, “Gilchrist” was described as such, “He is not so much physically abusive as verbally abusive and prone to "detaining" her--deciding that he doesn't want her to go to work and taking her keys, or removing the battery from her car, or changing the locks on the garage. But this has escalated to death threats against her and her coworkers; he's even put a knife to her throat. "Each little bout is a little bit worse." said Susan.

There is a stir at the bench; it seems there's a problem. There are three charges outstanding against Gilchrist--violating an order of protection, assault, and criminal damage to property, but only two of them are in his folder. They'll have to find the other one before they can proceed. "Pass," says Judge Gembala, and Gilchrist is taken out. Murphy Milano is fuming: that means the case has to be reviewed. They can't do anything until Gilchrist talks with the public defender and Jones talks with the state's attorney. This is the eighth time Gilchrist has violated an order of protection, and Judge Gembala had promised that the next time Gilchrist came before him he'd be put away, period.”

Susan did what she did in the backdrop of her own tragedy within the judicial confines of a system that was “all procedure and no heart.” In her words, she learned as she went along what worked and what didn't work: "Mostly, I went by my gut." Although she denied any obsession with the subject, she admitted, "I was relentless. I did what I felt was right, and I worked to show the media I wasn't just the flavor of the month.”

Former colleagues in the 90s spoke of Susan’s zealousness, her sincerity, her “Let’s take care of business NOW style, and her high productivity, and her personal need to stay uninvolved personally with her victims in order to be effective. You know you’ve created something meaningful when you need body guards. “The International Service Associates is a security agency, licensed and active in 16 states that until very recently served only as a contractor for the federal government. The sole exception to the rule: a few months ago ISA started providing bodyguards--free of charge--for Milano and the women she works with.”

Intimate Partner Violence had become a way of life in all sectors of society, much to the chagrin of Susan. Although she helped one person at a time, she was “the lone ranger” for so many years, as she skillfully navigated the system in her unique manner. Although her accomplishments were many, it was not until the inception of the Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit that a prevention tool was able to cut across boundaries and have equal access to anyone affected by IPV.

But, as I thought of creating this piece, I wondered, what was her “stage” like then as opposed to today? What was the history of the building at 1340 South Michigan, Domestic Violence Court?

According to a Chicago preservation website:

It was previously known as the “Interior Furniture Company” built in 1922 in Classical Revival style. The area of Michigan Avenue south of Roosevelt Road was originally residential and then gradually became a mercantile area, used by furniture companies, wholesale clothing companies, horse carriage companies, and later automobile companies. The mercantile history of the area, with loft structures that doubled as showrooms, created a high quality design of building facades that tell a story Chicago business and architecture meeting to create a unique building type. In later years, the building served as the site of the Domestic Violence Courthouse.

In 2005, there was a lot of controversy about whether this building, among others in a “not so nice area of town” was worth saving. Well, what a difference a couple of years and history makes…. For now we have – “Aviation Lofts” Luxury Living! See video too! How nice it would have been to “shelter victims of intimate partner violence” here!

What was the “flow of traffic” like when Susan was perusing the courtrooms? ''It was pretty much a mob scene going into the elevators. Often you would have victims and abusers going up the same elevators,'' said JoAnn F. Villasenor, the supervising attorney of LAF's Family Law Project,

There was a similar problem at 28 N. Clark St., where victims and offenders share a single waiting room. The new building streamlines services for the victims, but it may also improve things for practitioners and the judiciary.

Prior to the opening of the new “state of the art” building in 2005, …Only one judge heard civil orders of protection, When the new court opens, there will be two judges hearing those cases. There were more than 5,300 so-called ''independent'' civil orders of protection filed in 2004.

Civil orders of protection were being heard at 28 N. Clark St. Criminal orders of protection are heard at 1340 S. Michigan Ave, said Laura Bertucci, supervisor of the Domestic Violence Division for the Cook County State's Attorney's office . As is done at Central Bond Court at the Criminal Courts building, the felony preliminaries are held via closed-circuit television. 

“Completely Victim Friendly” for $64+ Million

Among its many advantages, the new Domestic Violence court ''is going to be completely victim-friendly'' was the rave!

The new building features separate entrances for alleged victims and alleged offenders, Bertucci said. There are also separate elevators and waiting rooms.

Additionally, there are spaces for an array of victims' advocates on the new court's first floor, Bertucci said. The scattered branches put a heavy burden on the victims.

''People who went to 13th and Michigan prior to the new building, , if there wasn’t enough evidence to sustain a criminal charge, then advocates told them to go to 28 N. Clark for a civil order. That made for a very long day for people who've very recently been victims of violence''.

The Maze of it all. Without GPS- “Organizational Structure” (See Map) And I’ll bet Susan knew it like the back of her hand!

The pièce de résistance- 555 West Harrison Street Children’s Advocacy Room

Although there has been child advocacy in the Chicago judicial system in various forms over the years, children are very vulnerable victims of domestic violence and need a safe harbor. The new courthouse has such a place. It provides a number of valuable services:


Postscript:

I’m thinking of a little girl from Chicago who wrote a poem expressing the violence that was happening in her home as a means of reaching out. The teacher and the principal did not believe her…and she was punished! That little girl, and author of “Holding My Hand Through Hell” was Susan Murphy Milano!

Donna Gore created a service program for crime victims and offers her assistance in creating a cohesive victim impact statement tailored to the individuals and their cases. She recognizes that this could be of great value to not only the crime victim, but to the court system as well.

By using Gore’s services a crime victim can be coached on how to best present their victim impact statement. From her vast experience volunteering in the courtroom, she is able to act as a liaison with advocates who may not have the same experiences. Working with the court advocates, attorneys, and prosecutors, not only will the crime victims’ voices be heard, they will be presented professionally, courteously, and effectively.

Donna R. Gore is a consultant and trainer with the Office of Victim Services within the US Department of Justice. She is the host of the internet radio show, Shattered Lives which broadcasts every Saturday at 5pm Eastern time on the Inside Lenz Network.

Domestic Violence: How to Spot the Lie

By Peter Hyatt

I hate political correctness, the freedoms it seeks to corral,  and I hate "months" designated for this or that.  Yet, even a broken watch is right, twice a day, and designating a month to raise awareness of domestic violence sits well with me. 

Susan Murphy Milano became a mentor, of sorts, for my work in helping (more than just advocating) for victims of D/V.

Susan Murphy-Milano
*photo/Monica Caison

Susan was amphetamines on steroids rolled up into a super pit bull of energy all at once.  Her bite was worse than her bark.  People loved her or hated her, and those that hated her, respected her.  If a "spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down", Susan had no time to stop off at the grocery store.  She moved at the speed of sound, and then some.  How cancer ever defeated her can only be explained by faith, as cancer, itself, should have feared Susan, as God knows, I did.  Yet it must have been that Christ, Himself, said, "I will be without Susan no longer" and summoned His dedicated messengers to yield her to Himself. 

Susan fought the good fight.  

Her last phone call with me haunts me still. 

Working two jobs, raising a family, and donating time to D/V victims and Missing Persons cases, I knew that Susan wrongfully thought that everyone else had her ability to jump through hoops without hesitation, sleep, or thought.  She needed me to:

a.  Keep my full time investigatory job;

b.  Keep my Statement Analysis jobs, including trainings

c.  Fly to Chicago to help film a pilot episode

d.  Go over "20/20" scripts, or something like that,

e.  Edit her new book.  (I did so, bawling my eyes out at each chapter)

f.  and, oh, by the way, discern if so and so is lying to her.  She knows he is, but she wants to make sure.  (Susan was intuitively good at lie detection but could not sit still for formal training.  She should have taught it, instead). 

She needed all of this done, one hour ago, yesterday. 

Then, there was this woman she knows, who's boyfriend had blackened her eyes, and I needed to...

This was her dedication to victims of 'intimate partner violence', as she called it.  The world was to stop to help a single victim plot her course of safety, and nothing was more important to Susan than the practical preparation for the victim. 

Susan did not "protest" Domestic Violence, as if walking around in circles, carrying a sign saying, "We are against Domestic Violence" while people across the street walked in circles, carried signs that said, "We are for Domestic Violence."

She was too sophisticated to buy into any political clap-trap that sounded like protection, but really only profited the politician who sought some nice publicity before women. 

Nope.

Susan was too busy getting the victim to find her birth certificate, medical records, toiletries, and other practicalities, to busy herself with self-seeking nonsense. 

Victims of Domestic Violence generally do not live in day to day violence. 

It isn't necessary. 

Once violence occurs, the vicim soon learns how to avoid violence by walking on eggshells, and keeping the controlling abuser satisfied.  

She learns to read his face and his body language, as necessity drives her instincts into overdrive. 

Susan could spot that look on a woman's face and know. 

I learned more from her than I wish I knew.  

Spot the Lie

"I woke up, got dressed, brushed my teeth, and went to work..."

This was from a theft investigation, years ago.  I noted from the teaching of Avinoam Sapir that when personal hygiene enters a statement, it is a signal of concealed information, often of a personal nature, which may be related to Domestic Violence.  

Why is this?

It is this way because few people (less than 10%) feel it necessary to tell us, in a written statement, that she brushed her teeth.  We all brush our teeth.  (I like to believe this when I stand close to someone at work).  Few of us feel the need to add it to our statements, even verbally when discussing our day's progress.

For the victim of Domestic Violence, life is out of control, living hour by hour on eggshells, carefully navigating the temper tantrums of the abuser, who does not need to be violent to control her. 

Her life is not her own.  It is his.  

The feeling of losing control sets off a panic button in all of us, which is often seen in the surrendered shoulders of someone in handcuffs, especially shortly after a struggle.  He is defeated. He cannot raise his arms to his face to protect his face, to cover his shame, or to even cover his tears.  He is utterly without control of his arms (which is why some then use their feet to fight). 

For the victim of Domestic Violence, her life is so out of control, that when she enters the bathroom and locks that door even for a few minutes, she feels control.  It is a significant part of her day, therefore, it enters her language.  

Even just the raising of awareness in the month of October helps.  

Susan is no longer with us.  

Some may feel that this is something that does not need to be said, but I think otherwise.  I feel her presence, through her words and work, and must remind myself that while I am at my desk, feeling overwhelmed with too much work, the phone is not going to ring and I am not going to be ripped into by her for not calling her back immediately. 

God, how I miss that. 

What Susan stood for, and did so in a loud, boisterous way, was planning.  Detailed planning goes far beyond holding a woman's hand and saying, "it will be alright."

No, it is not going to be alright unless we make it so.  The moment that she eludes the control of the abuser, the clock ticks.  The next 24 to 48 hours is when the domestic homicide is at its peak.  

"See ya, Babe!" wrote one man who killed his girlfriend, in an email to her, after her death, thinking that it would be helpful as an alibi. 

Nope.  

In fact, as he recalled their "fun" day together, the phrase, "See ya', Babe!" pinpointed her time of death.  I told the reporter that it would match the coroner's report and it was highly likely that these are the last words the victim heard before he pulled the trigger.  

We raise awareness and, true enough, it is lessening the fake "shame" some women feel, especially those who, as expected, walked in denial, attempted to "win" him back, blamed that "b****" of an ex wife, and made 101 excuses for him. 

Yet, overcoming the instinct to nurture, heal and love, she can, and must, get free.

Careful planning is the key. 

Awareness is helping, but advocacy must not stop with the Restraining Order.  

It continues with careful planning, confidentiality, financial support, and, when necessary, protection in the dangerous days and weeks after. 

Susan gave up on no one.  No victim's denial could wear her down.

She, being dead, speaks to us today, as we seek to continue to carry the torch. 

No need to search for heroes in our world, nor among the departed.  They are living among us, infirmities and failures abounding, yet overcoming, and helping others regain the dignity they were born with.  

Peter Hyatt is an expert and trainer in Statement Analysis. For detailed information about this science, where his interactive audience weighs in on real cases, and Peter's training posts, visit his site: Statement Analysis

Domestic Violence Awareness Month 2014

We enter into another October, another National Domestic Violence Awareness Month with hope and wonder about when it will all end.

Since the inception of this blog, devoted to SOS=Searching Out Solutions for victims of violence, we've seen news reports about new victims on a daily basis, some battered, some missing, and some murdered.

As long as there are those wounded by family violence, we have a long way to go to decrease the risk of harm and lethality.

The creation of this blog in 2009 was inspired by the title of the book, Time's Up! by the late Susan Murphy-Milano, but not only is it a forum for the complicated aspects of intimate partner violence, but all victims of violence.

Over the years we've been privileged to have hundreds and hundreds of informative posts from writers on a variety of topics, but with one thing in common, a desire to see positive changes in the way we deal with violence.

Realizing that change comes slowly, advocates across the country are not backing down from seeing those changes take place. Perhaps we can be of service by greasing the wheels, voting, or aligning ourselves with those in positions of power who can make it happen, sooner and not later.

 Domestic Violence Awareness Month 2014 

• Let's continue to unite our efforts to stop the bleeding. 
• Let's continue to speak out through this blog, continue to write about truthful controversy, help to pull in a wider audience who needs to learn, or those who have their own wisdom to impart.
• Let's push to engage more conversations about a subject that's often heated, one which has historically been divided on many lines. 
• Let's cross those lines, again and again, until there are no more victims who have to live in fear for themselves and their children.
• Let's unite as individuals and organizations moving towards a brighter future so that our children and grandchildren can make better informed choices and can learn to recognize what a healthy relationship looks like.
• Let's get serious about looking at more innovative measures to keep victims safe as they choose to leave abusive relationships, and thoroughly give credence to changes within our justice system to allow for better litigation of high risk cases. Simple tools can save BILLIONS and "check the box" safety planning is just not working!
• Let's put our children and their futures first when asking the courts for rulings based on fact, not innuendo.

We've invited several writers, some you will be familiar with if you've been following this blog, others new to the site. We hope that you will become a loyal reader, help share the posts, and encourage friendly dialogue throughout October and beyond!

Domestic Violence Awareness MUST be more than one month per year, after all, it occurs every day.

Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit (EAA) Timeless Tool For Escaping Abusive Relationships

Carrying the torch of Susan Murphy Milano’s work through Document The Abuse,  many advocates are bringing awareness to audiences and organizations across the country of the benefits of the Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit and teaching how it can be incorporated into existing protocols.

The Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit (EAA) was first introduced in Susan Murphy Milano's book, Time's Up: A Guide on How to Safely Leave an Abusive and Stalking Relationship and is still one of the most  significant contributions to the complicated issue of keeping victims of abuse from becoming murder victims. The importance of the EAA to first responders, law enforcement, court personnel, hospital personnel and domestic violence advocates was Murphy Milano's mission before her untimely death from cancer on October 28, 2012.

Time's Up contains all the information needed to create and complete a personal safety and escape plan, enhancing standard safety plans and personalizing the victim's own requirements.  The book has been offered as training to several advocates and organizations around the country and is often used as a textbook.

What is the Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit (EAA)?  From Document The Abuse:

The E.A.A. is a detailed, yet simple to perform process that walks the victim step-by-step through creating a legal document that will stand the test of many of the legal hurdles that are thrown at intimate partner violence and stalking cases.

The process helps the victim to prepare her history of abuse and stalking, utilize the included documents, gather other needed evidence, and distribute the documentation to specified people.

“The Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit contains information that is critical to help victims’ in documenting their experiences and creating a record to insure that instances of abuse are memorialized should they be needed for future use in the legal system” (Donna Pendergast is the First Assistant Attorney General Office of Special Investigations in Lansing Michigan.)

It is as immediate as buying the Times Up! e-book, downloading it, and following the instructions to prepare the document. For those who are worried about storing an e-book on a shared computer, the Times Up! book also conveniently comes in a print book format with easy to Xerox document pages. Used as a self-help procedure, any victim can easily complete this confidential process and be assured that their experiences are legally documented.

“The Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit is another tool to save lives. It’s practical, inspirational and USEABLE. The insights are precise and pragmatic.” (Hon. Nancy Sidote-Salyers, Former Prosecutor, Retired Circuit Court Judge)

The victims will also produce a short video telling in their own words, what abuse and stalking they have experienced. Included in the video is identifying information of the perpetrators identity, a photo, his social security number, place of employment, and patterns of abuse conduct.

Lethality factors are also discussed: weapons, assaults on others, drug use, mental health history and any other detailed information that helps the court understand his dangerousness.

Items of DNA evidence are suggested for collection, legal documents are filled out, a notarization process is followed, and distribution to safe and legal persons makes sure the E.A.A. is available should the victim be seriously harmed, goes missing, or is killed.

iEAA the App from Apple

The iEAA App brings safety planning into the age of technology. Developed by Allen Corporation in conjunction with Susan Murphy Milano and Chet Hosmer, the iEAA App was unveiled on July 4, 2012 (Independence Day) allowing the information to be downloaded and used on any Apple product.

This is the first phase of the App and further improvements and developments are currently in the works to bring the app into the Android market and capability of cloud storage.

Who Needs an EAA and Why?

Until now, the standard response for intimate partner violence and stalking from law enforcement has been:

* Victims are told to report (but action is only taken if you can show evidence of the abuse)
* Victims are told to go to a shelter
* Victims are told to get a restraining order (but usually only granted if there is evidence of the abuse)
* Victims are told to move away (but leaving behind careers, family, and assets)
* Victims are told to stay with someone else
* Victims are told stalking is hard to prove and stalking laws are often weak and poorly defined

This response does not help the victim ‘document’ the situations and specifics of her abuse and her abuser. Outside of a police report or restraining order, documentation has still not occurred. In a case of future serious injury, the victim goes missing, or is killed, nothing exists to link her to her story.

The E.A.A. has the propensity to document the historical aspects of the abuse and record it to challenge 'hearsay' arguments in a case. By simply following the steps of creating an E.A.A. a victim can provide 'before the event' information that presents the history of her case prior to serious injury, disappearance or death. Click here to read more about how the E.A.A. benefits a victim's case.

Information such as details of how the perpetrator has said he would carry out harming, abducting or killing her can be detailed. Admissions or comments made to her about other victims the perpetrator has harmed can be listed. Likely hiding places for weapons or evidence can be revealed. Possible alibis that he would make up for his defense (including identification of people who could be the perp’s co-defendants in her harm, abduction or murder). If the victim has existing scars or active wounds, they can be documented at the time of the E.A.A. creation.

The E.A.A. has the same informational capabilities of providing unknown and unrecognized abuser and stalking risk factors known by the victim.

For detailed information on how the EAA supports cases of abuse: CLICK HERE

For information on education, awareness and training on the EAA or personal assistance in creating your safety plan: CLICK HERE

If you are thinking about leaving an abusive relationship, BEFORE you announce your plans in a fit of anger or unclear thinking, think again and do what it takes to save your own life and keep your children safe.  Create your Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit to maximize your chances of getting out alive!

If you are out of the relationship and need extra support, you can contact The Institute for Relational Harm Reduction for expert information on how to heal.

Time’s Up: A Guide on How to Leave an Abusive and Stalking Relationship can be ordered through Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Books A Million, and all online digital and local book retailers. 

For quantity case orders and discounts, please contact ImaginePublicity, Tel: 843-808-0859, Email: contact@imaginepublicity.com

For detailed information about Susan Murphy Milano in her true crime memoir, Holding My Hand Through Hell, her last book, is available through Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Books A Million, and all online digital and local book retailers, or directly from the publisher, Ice Cube Press.

Based on a true story, told with the flow of a novel, spiced with frank wisdom and wit, Holding My Hand Through Hell encourages the reader to immerse themselves into this family’s life and is an inspiration to become an advocate for change in this world we all share. This book will incite discussion, debate, and heightened awareness about hope, survival, abuse, murder, and its impact on our society. In the end, it will leave readers both applauding this woman as well as wondering how she escaped, sometimes at the eleventh hour. Twenty years later, she has realized that God must have been holding her hand through hell, delivering her from the evils of her life in order to save others.

He Has a Dream!

by Neil Schori

Editor's note: Neil Schori has made a committment to assist victims of abuse through his church with the hope that other pastors will see this important service and offer it in their churches as well. Thank you Neil!

I have some huge dreams for 2012.  I hope you do, too.  I believe the best way to make dreams come true is by sharing them.  So here is one of mine...I want church leaders to step-up and realize the seriousness of domestic violence in their own congregations.  When one issue impacts the lives of 25% of a church congregation, serious attention must be given!  One easy way to understand how small actions can make a huge difference is to realize that 5 families can change the world for 1.3 million women each year subjected to abuse by the men that are supposed to care for them the most.

My vision is to find 5 families in each church in the nation to be safe houses for victims of abuse.  This would be safe, temporary housing for victims of domestic violence.  I also want to do widespread education of church leaders about the issue of domestic violence and to train church leaders how to use a tool (found on documenttheabuse.com) that will revolutionize the way we assist victims of abuse.  But the truth is…in order to do these things, we need financial assistance.

There are costs to the generous families that open their doors to victims and their children.  And we need help to pay for the costs of educating church leaders all over the country.  There are many needs that will arise and they always cost something.

We know that you may never be in a position to open your home to a victim…but maybe you have the money to give.  If you would like to give to this incredible dream, you may safely and securely donate here on our church Paypal account: http://napervillechristian.org/resources (then click on 'online giving’).

Thank you so much for your generosity!  Your gift WILL rescue victims of domestic violence and it will educate the next generation of people who will positively change our culture.

Peace,

Neil

Neil Schori serves as lead pastor of Naperville Christian Church, and is a remarkable advocate for those in abusive relationships.

Related articles

• Churches MUST become safe for #DV Victims (neilschori.com)
• Dream to Reality (neilschori.com)
• Leadership is a Lonely Place (timesupblog.blogspot.com)
• Is Drew Peterson Untouchable? (neilschori.com)

Time’s Up: Let Me Count The Ways to Save A Life

By Susan Murphy Milano

April 2010 launched the book, Time's Up: A Guide on How to Leave and Survive an Abusive and Stalking Relationship. The information contained in the book has been used by many victims of abuse in the almost 2 years since it became available to the public, and those who chose to follow the information in the book, are all still alive at a time when we are seeing record numbers of intimate partner murder/suicides and whole families being annihilated.

The Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit© is still not being used to its fullest potential by the legal, medical, and advocacy program communities, but it is available in many forms to the general public, and the testimonials are astounding. The testimonials are not just coming from recovered victims, but from those brave advocates who are using it on their own to best assist the victims who come to them for help.

Although not yet fully used as accepted practice in shelters and agencies across the country, Time's Up and the Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit© is being discussed throughout the nation in the domestic violence assistance community.  In the meantime, I've made this life-saving, but simple procedure available in as many formats as possible so that it's in the hands of those who need it most, the abuse victim.

Where can Time's Up and the Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit be found?

The website Document the Abuse was created to house all the information about the Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit©, it's purpose, it's benefits, and how to become certified to properly use the information on a case by case basis. The future of it's success lies in the organization of advocates in all victim services fields and their training in how to properly administer and create the individual safety plans and the EAA.

Time's Up: A Guide on How to Leave and Survive an Abusive and Stalking Relationship

The over-sized paperback book is available from Amazon, Barnes and Noble and all online retailers. You can request it through your local book stores if it's not yet being carried there.

It's also available on Kindle and as an ebook (pdf format) through several sites including Susan Murphy Milano's website and blog, susanmurphymilano.com and The Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education saferelationshipsmagazine.com 

Coming Soon!

The Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit © will soon be available in two new formats, an "interactive pdf" as well as the long awaited app from Apple.  Stay tuned for the announcements and where you can find them!

Time's Up is being translated into Spanish, we're very excited about being able to more effectively serve the Latino population, and will keep readers abreast of when it will be available.

Susan Murphy Milano is a staff member of the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education as an educator and specialist with intimate partner violence prevention strategies directing prevention for high risk situations and cases.


susanmurphymilano.com