How A Town Heals….

by Donna R. Gore, M.A.

In the aftermath of the mass homicides of Newtown, CT, Ladyjustice wondered how a town collectively heals after such events. We have innumerable examples from which to draw for purposes of discussion. What follows is not an exhaustive account, but a sampling of how each tragedy blossomed into positive remembrances.

The primary element… the motivation in each of these true life occurrences was that the focus was on the humanity and goodness of the victim(s) lost versus the event itself.

The Aftermath of July 23, 2007: The Petit Family Murders:

Following a rampage that included stalking, kidnapping, bank robbery, physical restraint, sexual assault/rape, torture ,murder and arson of Dr. William Petit, Jr and the three Petit women/girls, the State of Connecticut was shaken to its core. Cries for the death penalty for both offenders and an outpouring of collective grief and support were initiated by people around the globe. That one man could survive and ultimately carry on with life is a major miracle. How did the sleepy town of Cheshire begin and continue on the path of recovery?

 1) Within the Cheshire playground, Bartlem Park, lined with inscribed bricks, there is one that reads, “In Memory of the Petits;”

2) Cheshire Academy: Employer of Wife/Mother Jennifer Hawk-Petit. (a former nurse), created memorial garden in her name;

3) Creation of the Petit Family Foundation whose multiple missions include the sponsoring of scholarships in the areas of women pursuing careers in science, families of violent crime and Multiple Sclerosis. (Jennifer Hawk- Petit suffered from MS); Also: A 5K Road Race: http://www.petitfamilyfoundation.org/ways_to_support/participate_in_events/road_race/;

A Golf Tournament: http://www.petitfamilyfoundation.org/ways_to_support/participate_in_events/golf_tournament/

A “Motorcycle Ride for Justice” http://www.petitfamilyfoundation.org/ways_to_support/participate_in_events/ride_for_justice/

An Evening Honoring Women in Science: http://www.petitfamilyfoundation.org/ways_to_support/participate_in_events/wis_home/

A Running Team:

http://www.petitfamilyfoundation.org/ways_to_support/participate_in_events/pff_running_team/

Michaela, youngest daughter of the family, began a community service project, symbolically represented and continued by the harvesting of flower seeds originally salvaged from their home garden;

http://donnagore.com/tag/michaelas-garden-project

A concert:

http://pffpetit.posterous.com/elegy-world-premiere-july-19-2012/

The United Methodist Church remembers the Petit family throughout the year with special services, and floral arrangements;

A well known memorial garden is located at the site of the former Petit homer on Sorghum Mill Drive... The house was razed after being destroyed by arson set by the murderers. The garden is maintained by friends and neighbors and open to the public. http://donnagore.com/2011/06/19/the-legacy-of-the-petit-family-foundation/

The Aftermath of Columbine High School: 

April 20, 1999 A rampage by two crazed, depressed male students who were outcasts with a death wish with grandiose ideas to make an unforgettable impact on the world before they went down. The bomb failed….but the bullets seemingly never stopped until 12 students, and one teacher was shot dead, 21 others were injured.

The Greater Littletown Youth Initiative: After 13 years, this group comprised of school personnel. Mental health professionals, law enforcement and citizens continue to meet every Friday to discuss their children, issues and preventative measures to forestall future attacks: A strong emphasis is placed specifically on “Blueprint” programs. http://glyi.org/

A powerful “Lie-down protest” with dozens of participants by the steps of the State Capital the day after the shootings to plead for tougher gun laws.

http://www.deseretnews.com/article/705298653/Lie-down-recalls-13-Columbine-shootings-Participants-seek-stricter-gun-laws.html

Rachael’s Challenge: An outgrowth of kindness and compassion begun at the muddle school level- Anti-bullying;

http://www.rachelschallenge.org/big-picture/about-rachels-challenge/

Columbine CD Producer Announces New CD Project Honoring Life of Columbine Victim:

A new CD project has been launched by Columbine CD producer honoring the life and legacy of Rachel Joy Scott, the student who gained much notoriety from her death in the tragedy at Columbine High School. http://www.racheljoyscott.com/default.htm

Honoring Daniel
Welcome to the Daniel Mauser website. This site is dedicated to the memory of Daniel Conner Mauser. Daniel was taken from us in the tragic massacre at Columbine High School on April 20th, 1999.

http://www.danielmauser.com/index.html;

http://www.wfaa.com/community/rachels-challenge/Garland-grads-honor-the-victims-of-Columbine-156933925.html;

The !0th Anniversary of The Columbine Massacre: About 1,000 people gathered for a sunset memorial service at Clement Park, next to the school, where survivors, relatives and current students reflected on the massacre. A dove was released for each of the 13 victims as principal Frank DeAngelis read their names.

http://www.deseretnews.com/article/705298660/Victims-of-Columbine-High-massacre-honored-at-service-on-10th-anniversary.html?pg=al

The Aftermath of the Virginia Polytechnical Institute and State University Rampage Shootings:

On April 16, 2007, 32 students and faculty were killed on campus and 17 others injured in two separate attacks by a deranged student. The massacre prompted the state of Virginia to close legal loopholes that had previously allowed Cho, an individual adjudicated as mentally unsound, to purchase handguns without detection by the National Instant Criminal Background Check System (NICS). The incident prompted schools nationwide to install state-of-the-art notification systems that would broadcast warnings to cellphones, electronic bulletin boards, e-mail accounts and social media. Virginia Tech, especially, began responding to any campus threat

Day of Remembrance: We Remember: Organized runs, candlelight vigils, picnics poetry, music and other events have been part of the remembrance every year…

The Annual Day of Remembrance & Website: 32 students and faculty members who were tragically taken from their loved ones and our community on April 16, 2007. They ranged in age from 18 to 76 and represented a variety of academic areas, faith and ethnic groups

http://www.remembrance.vt.edu/2007/

http://www.weremember.vt.edu/index.html

VT Engage: The Community Learning Initiative: Includes a variety of service projects and grants to inspire VT students to become part of the larger community. http://www.engage.vt.edu/student-programs/;

The Office of Support & Recovery was initiated after the massacre to facilitate support, commemoration activities, student alerts and provide counseling;

http://www.recovery.vt.edu/index.html/

The Aftermath of the rampage shootings on January 8, 2011 and attempted assassination of Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords in Tucson Arizona. 

S x fatalities and 13 additional injured persons were targeted at a supermarket.

Americans for Responsible Citizens – Gabby Giffords and husband Mark Kelly’s effort to advocate for responsible gun policies and decrease the power of gun lobbies. http://americansforresponsiblesolutions.org/about/;

As of February 2012, the U.S, Navy honored Gabby Giffords by naming a ship in her honor for supporting the military and veterans, advocating for renewable energy and championing border security,”

http://www.navytimes.com/news/2012/02/navy-next-lcs-named-for-congresswoman-giffords-021012/


The Aftermath of Newtown, CT /Sandy Hook Elementary School Massacre- December 14. 2012.


A work still in progress…. with gifts, donations, honors and remembrances of every variety imaginable….. However a few words of caution from experts testifying before the Connecticut Legislature on “Recovering from National Tragedies: How Schools and Communities Recover” February 22, 2012:

Experts Dr. Thomas DeMaria of Long Island NY and the 911- Mass Homicides and Dr. Marlene Wong of Los Angeles spoke on this topic:

http://sowkweb.usc.edu/faculty/marleen-wong

http://www.zoominfo.com/p/Thomas-De%20Maria/60249540/



A couple of the many interesting points to keep in mind when formulating recommendations, and implementing policies regarding the outpouring of support and the physical environment of the event…..

1) Dealing with the outpouring of gifts – It is well intentioned, but can be a real problem and barrier to healing as schools have to rent warehouses to store the goods and figure out how to distribute equitably is a real problem as well as the increased expenses incurred. More importantly, the access to celebrities and, numerous material goods is not normal in the everyday scheme of life and should be done with care and caution.

2) It is vitally important to change the entire environment in which the event occurred (if it is not razed) such that children feel safe. Historically, they will not enter an environment where they witnessed violence. Therefore, changing the physical structure, layout, painting, making it bright and welcoming is very important for their healing.

3) If it is not changed, the scene tends to attract local voyeurs and curiosity seekers, going to the site, wanting to have their photo taken on site etc.

A sign of hope…. Both psychologists felt that there is a multitude of support in Newtown and Connecticut… and that they are better suited than many small towns to deal with the aftermath…. Link: http://ct-n.com/ondemand.asp?ID=8728


Conclusion: “How a town heals is a measure of the goodness of its people.”

To read more of Donna Gore's posts, and learn more about "LadyJustice," refer to her website: www.donnagore.com Donna is also a Featured Columnist for Here Women Talk and the host of SHATTERED LIVES each Saturday at 5ET.

Ready, Fire, Aim!

By Charles Moncrief

I did not kill John Kennedy. Trust me on this. More in a moment.

The day was Saturday, January 8, 2011. The place was Tucson, Arizona. The occasion was a rally featuring Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords, a Democrat. A man shot the Congresswoman and several others, some of whom were wounded fatally.

Sounds dispassionate when expressed this way, doesn’t it? But doesn’t a dispassionate presentation stand up favorably alongside the usual lies, knee-jerk reactions, and gleefully predatory judgments that the media raise against everyone who exercises free speech? The anchors at the television and radio news outlets, without any facts, immediately attributed the shooting rampage to certain commentators and former political candidates whose intention is to change the government of the United States. A sheriff in Arizona vilified anyone who dares to raise a voice against the rulers we currently serve. And before we suggest that it was his ignorance that caused him to get this backwards -- about government’s role as to serve the people -- I’d suggest that he has expressed his belief intentionally. He’s an elected official, after all.

The rush-to-judgment accusations made by the usual suspects -- the members of the press and the various columnists -- will never be retracted. This is because they know that the false witness they have borne (a clear violation of Commandment #9, if we need a refresher) will stand forever. It’s intentional, and follows the precedent used by the IRS several years ago when they published that Mohammad Ali was being investigated for possible tax evasion. When the former boxer was cleared of wrongdoing (a charge that he never should have faced in the first place), little if any reporting occurred; fear-based compliance with IRS rules will always trump the truth.

Guilt by Association

Those who promote a certain political ideology (or seem to promote such) are now getting such rotten treatment that Rush Limbaugh is almost being pictured as the trigger man and Sarah Palin is being depicted as the gun moll. Whether you agree or disagree with either person, whether you like or dislike their manners of presentation, you can’t miss the immediate cheap shots taken at both of them by the media once the “(D)” appeared next to the Congresswoman’s name.

All I can do is thank God that the very few commentators who tried to bring racism into the false accusations were somehow silenced.

I lived in Dallas on November 22, 1963. I was too young to vote, but was aware of the differences between Richard Nixon and John Kennedy. I was also aware of the generally conservative tone in Dallas, but had no idea of the extent to which Dallas would be hated following the President’s assassination. Approximately a half million Dallasites were all guilty of murder in the eyes of the world, an attitude promoted by our respected news leaders of the time. But please trust me. Whether Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone or was part of a conspiracy, it was neither the city of Dallas nor its body of residents who pulled off this horrible event. My lifelong gratitude now goes to J. R. Ewing and Lorimar Productions for restoring Dallas to greatness in the eyes of the world. (Isn’t it ironic that the shooting of the main character did so much to heal the city’s image?)

Shifting Blame

Normally I would have written this article for some other outlet, rather than for this blog site. (But be assured that I would write this in any case!) But there is a direct bearing on the lives of anyone who survives violence and abuse.

Remember Tailhook and the questions that followed? Why did the women go into the part of the hotel where they would be molested by a group of Navy pilots celebrating? Remember the accusations that the women deserved to be fondled and abused since they went there?

Remember the accusations that Mary Jo Kopechne deserved to die at Chappaquiddick because she consorted with the Kennedy family?

Remember the accusations made against every woman who files charges against a rapist?

Remember the accusations made against a woman who goes to the emergency room as a result of domestic violence?

Does it not speak to a sickness in our society when we blame someone other than the person who committed a crime or other atrocity? Granted, there is a lot of profit in the “Sue the Money” philosophy that, among other things, puts a bar out of business when an intoxicated patron kills someone while behind the wheel.

But it is fashionable, and it even feeds a public addiction, to shift blame to someone other than the perpetrator. Parental upbringing, faulty public education, schoolyard bullying, and teenage heartbreaks are favorite targets for cocktail chatter now. Even insensitive pastoral counseling (did you think I’d leave myself and my colleagues out of this presentation?) become the stuff of accusation.

Reality of Responsibility

We truly need to force ourselves into a reality check.

The gunman who pulled the trigger in Tucson should be the focus of our attention.

The men who abused the women in the Tailhook scandal were responsible.

The boys who shot the people in Columbine High School were at fault.

The drunk behind the wheel of the car deserves to stand accountable.

The cause of whatever is wrong with my life may have someone else’s name on it: my father, my mother, my brother, my first-grade teacher, my seminary professor, et al. But the recovery from everything has MY name on it.

I’ll deviate from all I’ve said above, about shifting responsibility away from the perpetrator of atrocities such as the one in Tucson, with this alone: a paraphrase of statements by Michael Youssef, Billy Graham, and other leaders.

When we shove God out of our society, we leave a spiritual void that gets readily filled by the forces of evil and opens our lives to evil for which we have no legitimate appeal other than to beg for grace and mercy from the One from whom we have turned away.

May we once again turn back to the only hope for the world.

Grace and Peace,
Charles+