A Hug is Worth a Thousand Words… Project Smile

by Donna R. Gore, M.A.

Do you recall your favorite toy growing up? What was that special source of comfort for you when life was so unfair and Mom wasn’t available? For “Little Girljustice” – in and out of the hospital so many times she couldn’t count, it was the classic “Raggedy Ann” doll. For LJ’s sister, Holly, it was a blanket … just like Linus! We remember the ritual of the tattered remains being brought out to the garbage barrels and then gone forever… ‘Quite traumatic!

A “normal childhood” can be traumatic in itself. However, just imagine if you are a vulnerable child witnessing for the first time… or innumerable times… the horror of domestic violence, child abuse, sexual assault, chronic illness or the ravages of a house fire. What is a child to do? Run or curl up in a ball…into the fetal position? Who can a child turn to in such situations?

Enter Catherine Pisacane from Hopedale, Massachusetts. (Hopedale is a quaint looking small town of 5.3 square miles with approximately 6,000 residents in Central Massachusetts – Worchester County). Ms. Pisacane was a Hunter College graduate, majoring in English… who just happened to acquire a degree in criminal justice as well.

It was against this backdrop that Catherine’s heartstrings were pulled in the worst (or best) of ways… A newspaper account told of three young brothers from New Jersey who were starved by their adaptive parents. What?? Yes… sadly this does happen more often than you would think. Adoption is not always motivated by love… but another way to “abuse the system and rake in the money.” As the story goes, the three little boys were taken into protective custody, and brought to the police station. One of the boys was given a small stuffed animal (a tiger) during interviewing and clung to it for dear life, as it obviously provided the comfort he so badly needed!

This tragedy was the impetus for the initiation of “Project Smile,” a tax exempt non-profit, donating small stuffed animals, toys, coloring books/crayons and storybooks to first responders such as police, fire fighters and ambulance crews who in turn, distribute them to needy children in the course of their jobs. Currently all New England States and Arizona participate, according to their website information. Statistics to date: Participation:

Massachusetts – State & Local Police Total – 87 Departments; Massachusetts Fire Fighters & Ambulance Total – 37 Departments; New Hampshire Total 2 Departments; Maine Total 1 Department; Connecticut Total 7 Departments; Rhode Island Total 5 Departments; New Jersey Total 1 Department; Arizona Total 1 Department

In addition, Project Smile has developed a partnership with the Department of Children and Families by assisting approximately 7,000 children in foster care and children living in shelters.

[LJ- May is National Foster Care Month: In Connecticut, 4,441 children were in state care as of April 2012; 71% lived in a family setting – traditional foster care or a relative’s home; 3,298 homes were licensed to provide care as of April 2012; For more information on becoming a foster or adoptive parent in Connecticut, call 888-KID-HERO or go to www.ctfosteradopt.com.]

Who Benefits?

As stated earlier, those children who are vulnerable to situations of domestic violence, child abuse, sexual assault, chronic illness, grief over the loss of family members and house fires are typical scenarios. [Ladyjustice can envision other scenarios such as child neglect from parental drug addiction or alcoholism, children in frequent transition from shelters, foster care situations, or extended hospitalizations,]

Expansion of Services

As of January 2008, Catherine expanded her services to include seniors who have been diagnosed with various forms of dementia, including Alzheimer’s disease. When these patients make the transition from their home residence to a nursing home, it can be very frightening and traumatic. Furthermore, these patients can feel a sense of comfort and the introduction of a stuffed animal by a police officer or EMT can produce a calming effect, similar to that of a child. And so… we have long lasting benefit at both ends of the spectrum.

How Does It Work?

New or gently used items in excellent condition can be purchased or dropped off at a location close to you …or mailed to Project Smile. (***See guidelines/restrictions at this link: http://www.projectsmile.org/help.htm. There are size, condition and “noise” restrictions on donated stuffed animals and small toys.

How You Can Help – Options:

Ø Volunteer to start a local chapter anywhere in the U.S. with their guidance;

Ø Make a financial (tax deductible) contribution via their headquarters…or through Virtual Aid Drive. This option enables you to see/shop for items that are truly needed, as well as offering a time efficient and cost efficient manner. (The majority of items range from $2.99 to $4.99 using this method. http://vad.aidmatrix.org/vadxml.cfm?driveid=2497;

Ø Using Project Smile’s Guidelines, sort out your own items, drop off locally or mail. For larger bulk donations, please call first for arrangements.

Fundraising events and application for grants appear to be on-going as well!

Stay tuned… Christine Pisacane and one of her first responders may be a “Shattered Lives” radio guest in the future (if we’re lucky!)

Contact Info:

Ms. Christine Pisacane, Executive Director

Project Smile

P.O. Box 336

Hopedale, MA 01747

cpisacane@projectsmile.org;

Tel: (508) 634-0203


“Hugs” Ladyjustice!

To read more of Donna Gore's posts, and learn more about "LadyJustice," refer to her website: www.donnagore.com Donna is also a Featured Columnist for Here Women Talk and the host of SHATTERED LIVES each Saturday at 5ET.

Soulful Medicine

by Jillian Maas Backman

As an intuitive life coach I find it very rewarding to write encouraging words which inspire hope and change to all that read my blog posts. This one was suppose to cover the intrinsic benefits from the practice of meditation. However, life has a funny way of changing directions without your permission. There are times when roles reverse themselves with a blink of an eye and the life coach becomes a student in the course of life on purpose.

I was asked to join the team of Time’s Up authors because of my diverse background in both life coaching and intuitive sensing. It lends itself to an interesting perspective of both intellectual thought and soulful insights that are unique to all of us. I have also been quietly involved behind the scenes in dozens of unsolved missing person cases over the years, and have been quite happy to convey intuitive messages to those much more capable than I to implement progress to every case. It has afforded me the opportunity to create a deliberate separation from those directly involved. More importantly, keeps me grounded in my own intuitive space for clarity without outside distractions.

Since involving myself in the Time’s Up movement I have seen post after post of heartbreaking accounts of missing person cases, and unsolved mysteries occurring throughout America every day. It has become so prevalent in all communities there is no escaping the indisputable fact that each one of us will probably be personally touched by this human epidemic at some point in our life.

You would think working so closely in this field I would be prepared for whatever comes my way. Growing up in the church, I was faced with the undeniable truth of human tribulations on a regular basis. However, no matter how many times you experience first-hand suffrage through the eyes of another you never get used to sensing the toll it takes on a human soul to endure the loss through tragic circumstances.

I recently crossed paths with a man in a nearby community that was directly involved in an unsolved missing person’s case. In fact, it was the father of the missing child. As he began to recite his story I found myself lost in his sorrow as a mother and an intuitive. I immediately began searching inside myself, attempting to gather up some insightful intuitive wisdom to fill the silence between us, possibly easing his aching heart for just a moment. There was nothing appropriate that could convey his loss was my loss. His human confusion was now a part of my human confusion. Two strangers struggling awkwardly towards the same outcome, a higher understanding of what he and his family were going through.

As a natural born healer we are trained to jump directly into “saving mode.” I was drawn to provide some kind of clarity to this man’s desperate disillusion and supply him with appropriate intuitive answers to his unsolvable reality of human experiences. I could not bring his child back home or make his family feel better emotionally, mentally, physically, or spiritually. I had nothing but love to share with him. Love of the energy kind. The soulful medicine that can heal the deepest human wounds anyone can withstand.

I will probably never see this gentle lost father ever again, but the loss of his child will be forever in my heart. He brought forth a lesson I shall never forget. There may be times in the future when I become too comfortable in my separate isolation from the world at large. Hopefully I will never become complacent with the intuitive work at hand and remember each family is unique in processing their own grief. As healers, we should let their specialness be our guide to uncovering unseen clues from the universe.

As we parted ways, both turned to a tried and true method of human coping that supersedes all man-made grief. He asked me if I would pray for his child. I did what this distressed father asked me to do. I prayed. I prayed for his family as a mother and an intuitive interpreter for peace in the distant future for all those involved.

In ever-growing gratitude,

Jillian Maas Backman

Yours…Mine…Ours

By Gaetane Borders 

 

 Do you ever wonder why children seem to be miniature portraits of their parents? Sometimes I laugh aloud when I watch my son walking because he has the exact same gait and swagger that my husband has. The only problem is that my husband walks the way that he does because he has a bad back and knees from the wear and tear over the years. So why then does our nine-year-old’s walk mirror his father’s? Surely he doesn’t have pre-arthritic symptoms! The answer is pretty clear…he has adopted his juvenile swagger due to the phenomenon known as modeling.

While there is no harm in a child copying his daddy’s walking pattern, this mimicking can pose a problem when it relates to emotional issues. How we cope, how we express our emotions, and how we demonstrate love and admiration are all things that we pass on to our children. Oftentimes I can tell what parents are like before meeting them just by the way their children act. For example, kids who are unduly aggressive or who use profane language are usually in an environment where they see and hear such behaviors. Sure, behavior and temperament do have a genetic component as well. But remember that children learn largely by watching what we adults do and how we react.

A national study was done recently in which it reported that 1 out of 4 adults is clinically depressed. Suicide is on the rise, particularly among African American men. Other studies show that 1 out of 3 girls are molested before the age of 18, and 1 out of 5 boys report having been molested during this same time frame. The emotional baggage that this sort of trauma creates is extensive, and without the needed therapy can have lasting debilitating effects. Moreover, it can negatively impact future relationships and how one relates to others.

It is so important to the success of our families that we, as adults, heal ourselves so that we can be fully functional, happy, and effective parents. Our children are watching, learning, and imitating our behaviors, and your baggage can ultimately become their baggage. If you or a loved one is experiencing symptoms related to depression or anxiety, please consult with a counseling professional. It will not only make a difference in your life, it will make a difference in your child’s life as well.