Thursday, March 18, 2010

Fishing on Facebook For Victims Rights

By Karen Rae Elkins


"America will never be destroyed from the outside. If we falter and lose our freedoms, it will be because we destroyed ourselves" says former US President Abraham Lincoln. Our rights seem to fade with every report of violence. The law doesn't always guarantee justice. Scores of abusive people walk the streets every day: from strangers to relatives.

There is never an excuse for Domestic Violence. EVER. Why do people question the person, usually a woman, for staying? Maybe, a more direct question should be asked, "When is it ok to hit a woman?"  NEVER.

There is too much focus on the victim of abuse and the "whys" and too little on a criminal who walks among us.  Hitting a woman is a crime, period. If you are man enough to hit a woman, you are man enough to go straight to jail.

I got a head's up from friends about a social group called " 
Reasons when its acceptable to punch a woman in the face,"  Growing up in a newspaper family and later working for a newspaper, the freedom of speech was explained to me as a born right.

Words are powerful. Words determine the way you think. The way you think, determines the way you feel. The way you feel, builds images in your mind. Those images produce an action.

What would you do?  I was torn. Which side of the coin would I chose? Do I protect my rights as a writer/artist and ignore the facebook page? Or, do I protect women from all forms of violence? What if someone deemed my blog as hatred and used my words against me? How would I feel? What if I did nothing and a woman who is currently in a violent situation realizes that her abuser is a fan of the Facebook page? How would I feel? The criminal among us has just been validated for illegal behavior. It's just not good policy to promote and make light of a situation that often results in a violent death for others.

I checked for friends in common! SSSShhhew, There were none. However, the page had over 20,000 fans. The group was brutal. There was a list of 60 reasons. The admin claimed it was a joke as he stated in reason #59:

Acceptable Reason 59, "Making and joining a petition group to take this group down for promoting violence when its clearly a joke :P"  In his closing statement he removed reason 60,  *The last joke removed cus it went too far* and as you read these, remember someone who abuses their partner isn't worth anything but despise."

Advocates against violence spend long hours undoing the effects of violence. Jokes don't usually hurt, they produce laughter. I questioned my feelings. Was I too close to the situation to be objective?

I was not willing to let this sleeping dog lie. There was nothing funny about threats of violence.

Isn't that the way violence starts, a simple threat?  Anyone who hits a woman will do just about anything.

The group was removed from facebook within days. On that day, many advocates could breathe a sigh of relief and say "Gotcha"!  Ah... that is such a fishing phrase. You see, we are all fishermen in one respect or another. Some fish for victims of abuse, others fish for a cure for cancer. While yet another group champions children's issues or the soldier who volunteers for service in our 
Armed Forces because he believes in America.

I chose not to re-publish many of the acceptable reasons to hit a woman in my article. They have said enough. Remember, I believe there is no reason ever, to hit a woman. The admin mentioned "the last one removed cus it went too far". They opened the door so I'm going to close it. You be the judge.

Acceptable Reason # 60. ONLY REASON TO NOT HIT A WOMAN IN THE FACE…when she’s pregnant…..punch her in the stomach.

I wonder? When did doing the right thing, become wrong? What happened to chivalry? Where is the love?

Enough said, It's time to just go fishing for bass in the lake I grew up on... breathe a sign of relief and say to the bass, "Gotcha."  


Time's Up until next time, fish steady. Love, Karen 

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1 comment:

  1. Karen,

    When a link for that group popped up on my FB wall, I checked it out. Admittedly, I was truly appalled and felt insulted as a woman. Still, although I didn't like the implications of the jokes, I did think the admin of the site really wanted it to just be a fun thing. But it got out of hand because in reality there is no fun way to laugh about punching anyone in the face or anywhere else on their body. After the first was taken down, a second one was made and I believe (haven't checked to see for sure) that one, too, was taken down.

    We, all persons, have rights and all of us have said things that we shouldn't have. But, sometimes some go too far.

    I will just close with words from Oliver Wendell Holmes: A word is not a crystal, transparent and unchanged, it is the skin of a living thought and may vary greatly in color and content according to the circumstances and the time in which it is used.

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