Self-Worth; Fight For It, Damn It!

By Anny Jacoby

Why do so many women feel that they are not worthy? How did they lose their self-worth? Is it because of the way the world has portrayed a perfect women "today"? Is it because someone took it from them? Is that the void some fill by over eating? Did their partner breach a trust? Did their partner demean them with insults about how they look? Did their partner admire other women? Did they grow up being ridiculed by a family member? Have they been suffering from a controlling illness? Were they bullied and criticized through their school years? Were they sexually abused as a child? Were they laughed at in a moment of vulnerability? Were they ever raped or abused?

"Self-worth" is a word that is so much easier to say and spell than it is to feel.

All of the above experiences mentioned and so many more play a major part of pouring a woman's self-worth right down the toilet. The people causing these kind of negative actions are totally responsible for destroying and tearing down a woman's worth. To destroy or tear down a woman's self-worth is one of the cruelest ways to treat a human being. It is a no win situation for that woman. She cannot fight back. She is attacked blindfolded. Humiliation has succeeded - the battle is won. Anyone can win against innocence. When the battle turns around is when the true win begins. A true win is when a woman who has lost her self-worth stands up and takes the control back.

You are not responsible for falling or losing the battle. But YOU ARE TOTALLY responsible for getting back up. It is you that has to pull it together. You need to go back as far as you can in your mind that puts a smile on your face, remembering those "warm and fuzzy", happy times. If you can't then think of someone that you know that is hurting more deeply than yourself and use that as your motivation. Allow yourself to go there in your mind. Use these thoughts to give you reason to get up. Your self-worth IS worth fighting for.

Yes, perhaps you have been hurt, disappointed and raped of one of your most sacred emotions, SELF-WORTH. NOW YOU WANT IT BACK, SO TAKE IT BACK! It is right inside of you. You just have to bury the memories and pain under all of your dirty laundry. You can continue to feel empty, use drugs, alcohol or even food to fill that void inside of you. You can miss out on life because you are forgetting to fight and it is so much easier to have a pity party.

You can worry about if you try to gain back your self-worth that you will fail and feel even more lonely. You may fail the first try, second or even the third. You feel that it's all hopeless. If you give into that feeling, then you are truly letting yourself down as well as others that love and care for you. YOU have now become responsible for losing your chance at regaining YOUR self-worth. You are allowing whatever it was that tore you apart in the first place to take control of all of you and your soul. You are allowing a memory to defeat you. There is no person there, just a thought. Why are you doing this? You know that you can stop it. You know how!

The strength of negative thinking is overwhelming and controlling in itself. I have felt it's power many, many times. Honestly, to the point that I could hardly feel myself breath. That was when I knew that I, and only I could stop it and take back the control of MY DESTINY.

For those that have been through a battle and are struggling or may have struggled to just get up on an elbow, feeling empty inside and so alone that you wonder why you even got up today............YOU CAN AND WILL BEAT THIS!

GAINING BACK YOUR SELF-WORTH

You must look inside of yourself and dig for the real you. Don't dig for the you has been scarred, wounded or hurt but the you that can smile, laugh and appreciate all of the good things in life. If you will just open your positive side and allow the great things to reach you the feeling will truly be uplifting. The more positive thoughts that you fill yourself with, the less negative thoughts can't nor won't survive.

Pick yourself up, dust yourself off; you must move onto HABITS - positive habits of thinking. You must also be honest with your bad habits, what they are and where they are taking you. Identify them and how they are bringing you down, instead of up. The bad habits you have allowed to run your life. Now, as you have invited them in, you will un-invite them.

You must reconstruct your thought patterns to think WIN, not to lose. Immediately remove the words, "give up" from your vocabulary and replace them with "NEVER GIVE UP!" You must make a new commitment to yourself, the only one that you can reach out and touch!

You will always be stronger than your greatest weaknesses. Those weaknesses will never win again against your strengths..........NEVER!

To strengthen the mental you, you must strengthen the physical you. I am not referring to becoming a body builder or a full bore athlete. I simply mean a healthier you, A YOU THAT YOU WANT TO BE!

You must always remember, whatever it was that brought you down in yourself is in the past. If you continue to allow the pain to live inside of you, you will suffer. The past is over and there is no suffering on your part that will erase it. Get on with life. Reach deep inside of yourself and bring back the who YOU are.

Bring back the person YOU can smile in the mirror at.

Bring back the person YOU talk to all of the time.

Bring back the person that YOU were meant to be.

Bring back YOU, and then.......YOU WILL HAVE YOUR SELF-WORTH BACK - FIGHT FOR IT, DAMN IT!

"You can't conquer what you can't confront."

Take care and STAY SAFE!